As a first – time dad, let me tell you, this thing is scary. You can read all the parenting books and take all the parenting classes but nothing can prepare you for what happens when your sweet, little poop machine arrives. That is, at least in my case. Don’t worry brother, I’ve you covered. For all you future dads out there, here’s what to expect during your new experience as a dad.
1. She wins – you lose
Fellas, this may be one of the most frustrating pills to swallow but that’s kind of one of the things that make us awesome. All decisions will be made equally in your relationship or at least I hope but that goes out the window when she’s pregnant. Her hormones are working overtime so don’t be surprised if you get “the look of death” when stating your opinion. There’s no shame in waving your white flag.
2. Sleep? You’ll wish
As a dad working full time, one of the biggest challenges is being a full-time dad but we’ll get into that another time. Sleep. The biggest shock to my system to date. Heed all the warnings to get as much rest as possible before your beautiful monster arrives because at that point there won’t be much sleep going on and not in a good way.
When my daughter was a newborn, she would barely go 2 hours without crying to be fed or just in need of some attention. My girlfriend and I decided teamwork makes the dreamwork and decided to sleep in shifts instead of constantly waking up out of our beauty sleep to answer our call to duty. We stopped a few scares immediately since one of us would always be focused on her but with early meetings, long hours and cat nap nights, you will look like an extra from The Walking Dead for a few months. Wear your bags (scars) with pride.
3. Don’t touch her food
I learned this the hard way when I almost lost an eye when she was pregnant with our daughter. Let’s not even dive into the fact that she ate half of my dinner which is the reason why I wanted some of hers in the first place. What’s yours is hers and what’s hers is …. well .. do you value your eye?
4. Have fun
You’re a dad now, don’t dread it – have fun with this new experience. This is your opportunity to spread your Jedi wisdom to the next generation. Make the most of every moment because before you know it, they’ll be off to college. Gotta run now, she’s up from her nap and it’s time to plan Operation Lock Mom In The Bathroom.